So you did Fox’s bidding on this show. You did your nice little conservative hit job on me. What I want to know is…

Every so often, a friend of mine will comment on what a terrible leader President Clinton was. He does it with a wink and a nod, in a way that assumes a mutual opinion. While he has made these comments no more than three times over the course of our nearly year-long friendship, he has done so during times when neither the time nor the place were appropriate to formulate a proper response.

Tonight I watched the Fox News Sunday Interview with Bill Clinton which was wildly entertaining. Chris Wallace had his ass handed to him by a spirited Bill Clinton, which makes me feel like finally rebutting the nod-and-wink comments of my friend about Bill Clinton (implicit in his commentary on Bill Clinton is the idea that George W. Bush is a great leader- a view I do not share.) Chris Wallace’s constant smirk felt like a nod-and-wink moment, too, which prompted me to comment.

First a moment on Fox’s Clinton interview. Possibly my favourite moment of the interview happened when Chris Wallace asks about Clinton‘s efforts to kill or capture Bin Laden. He asks,

WALLACE: Do you think you did enough, sir?

CLINTON: No, because I didn’t get him.

WALLACE: Right.

CLINTON: But at least I tried. That’s the difference in me and some, including all the right-wingers who are attacking me now. They ridiculed me for trying. They had eight months to try. They did not try. I tried. So I tried and failed. When I failed, I left a comprehensive anti-terror strategy and the best guy in the country, Dick Clarke, who got demoted. So you did Fox’s bidding on this show. You did your nice little conservative hit job on me. What I want to know is…

WALLACE: Well, wait a minute, sir.

CLINTON: No, wait. No, no…

WALLACE: I want to ask a question. You don’t think that’s a legitimate question?

CLINTON: It was a perfectly legitimate question, but I want to know how many people in the Bush administration you asked this question of. I want to know how many people in the Bush administration you asked, Why didn’t you do anything about the Cole?

________
Brilliant. Anyone who has read the 9/11 Commission Report (who is honest with himself) has probably wondered the same thing. But let’s broaden the scope in a way that, unfortunately, won’t allow me to pursue a rigorous academic study of the contrasting leadership of the current and former White House administrations, but which will still permit a wider aperture to look through than through the lens of, say, just the so-called war on terror.

Let me state very clearly that I believe Bill Clinton was a far superior leader in every characterization of the word. There is no hiding behind thinly-veiled objectivism here, which is the modus operandi for many media outlets these days (a great example would be the Wallace/Clinton interview).

On nearly every suggested quality of leadership, Bill Clinton leads over George Bush. Granted, Bush has leadership qualities. One doesn’t become POTUS without some of these qualities. But while Bush has a moderate sprinkling of these traits, Clinton has them in spades. Namely,

Talent. Both men arguably have talent. You don‘t become President without some talent. However, Bill is actually younger than Bush, despite serving two full terms before George started his. In fact, Bill is the youngest President to ever exit office (second youngest to be elected to office, after JFK).

Intelligence. This category is a bit unfair. George’s Texas drawl makes him appear as a bumbling idiot, but Bill is from the south too, and he still doesn’t coin his own words. And if he does, I’m sure he would never coin “Suiciders.” Bush has a tenuous grasp of grammar, at best (a particular pet peeve of mine). But while it may seem cute or harmless, it might be indicative of some greater problem. Some famous Bush trademarks:

Mispronunciation, particularly of the word nuclear.(Pronounced "Nukyular")

Occasional use of spoonerisms such as "mexed missages" (mixed messages) and "terriers and bariffs" (barriers and tariffs).

Use of two modal verbs, such as "musta could've."

Nonsensical statements, such as, "I am here to make an announcement that this Thursday, ticket counters and airplanes will fly out of Ronald Reagan Airport."

Adding agentive endings to words not usually accustomed to such treatment, such as "suiciders".

Constructing neologisms such as "tacular" (a portmanteau of "tactical" and "nucular") and "misunderestimated" ("misunderstood" and "underestimated").

Use of words that sound similar to intended words but are wrong in the context (i.e., malapropism). "Nuclear power pants" instead of "nuclear power plants."

Slang and double negatives, as in "We've not got no better friend and ally than South Korea."

Redundant or odd sentence construction, such as "We had a chance to visit with Teresa Nelson who's a parent, and a mom or a dad."

Psychoanalyst Justin Frank suggests in his 2004 book, Bush on the Couch: Inside the Mind of the President, that based on "growing anecdotal evidence," President Bush may suffer from dyslexia or Attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder, observing:

“Naturally, the occasional misstatement or discrepancy between word and deed may be dismissed as politics as usual. But when the most powerful man on the planet consistently exhibits an array of multiple, serious, and untreated symptoms — any one of which I've seen patients need years to work through — it's certainly cause for further investigation, if not for outright alarm. President Bush is not my patient, of course, but the discipline of applied psychoanalysis gives us a way to make as much sense of his psyche as he is likely ever to allow.”

On the other hand, Bill Clinton is generally recognized as having a high IQ, and is a long-time member of Mensa. He is an avid reader, as demonstrated by his insistence of having his daily CIA briefings in written reports, versus George W. who insists on oral debriefing. Bush defenders would cite such attacks as malicious and elitist. I say, generally you want your president to be intelligent. I can demonstrate very little evidence of Bush’s intelligence. His presence in office could be enough to demonstrate this, but people have often claimed the presidency is a popularity contest; more about name-recognition than pure intelligence. The belief (by some) that Bush is a puppet could possibly be supported by the fact that he had to have rigorous foreign-policy tutoring by Condy.

Charisma. It seems unfair to place undue emphasis on the categories where Bill is clearly ahead of George, but charisma is a critical component to leadership. It is how you influence the people you lead. This attractiveness to others gives the charismatic individual the ability to leverage this esteem to motivate others. Bush has polarized the nation, and squandered an opportunity (post 9/11) to unify the country and, perhaps, the world. People enjoy how Bush shoots straight from the hip. I do appreciate his honesty (when I know he is being honest, and not lying about WMDs), but Clinton takes the charisma category. Maybe not for the Republicans who hate him, but they’d hate him no matter how charismatic he is.

I could and should go on, but it’s already nearly 2:00 am. Clearly I’m leaning towards one camp, but that’s not to say I can’t recognize when someone has talent, even if they are on the other side. Abraham Lincoln was a talented, charismatic Republican, and is counted among the best American Presidents ever. Rightfully so. And so I expect citizens to critically analyze the characteristics of their leaders. Put your president under a microscope, not on a pedestal.

When Bill was president, I questioned his logic and vehemently disagreed with many of his policies, including his reversal of automobile fuel efficiencies, or the suspicious 11th-hour pardons he granted to over 200 felons before leaving office. But in the leadership category, I still have to vote for him every time over Bush.

Getting back to my friend who hates Bill Clinton, when he shakes his head at the thought of another horrible president like Bill Clinton, I keep wishing I have to the time to say,

“Horrible president? Horrible like being widely cited as being stupid?* Horrible like manning the helm during the single worst terrorist attack on American soil and not only not being criticized for inaction, but actually receiving the highest approval ratings in years? Horrible like squandering your opportunity to unite a nation under attack? That kind of horrible? Or horrible like over-emphasizing (read: fabricating) the connection between Al Qaeda and Iraq in order to convince the American people to support the invasion of a sovereign nation? Or are you scared of a Clintonesque president either lying or just plain wrong about the presence of WMDs to prop up an aggressive, costly preemptive war? Are you worried a Clintonesque president would eliminate valuable sex-education (where teens are taught the safety of condoms) in favour of abstinence education (where kids are taught … um…)? Are you worried about a president that would plunge the country into deep debt (despite this boon of an economy that everyone is so impressed with); a president who would suspend the rights of so-called terrorists (so-called because they never received a trial, and so we don’t really know); a president who would rush into war, champing at the bit, instead of letting Hans Blix finish his work, and giving the free world a chance to get behind it, thus giving it legitimacy; a president who would originally pursue a hands-off approach to dealing with the Israel/Palestinian conflict; a president who would champion a war against Iraq--who stated they have no ill intention towards the U.S.--while ignoring Iran and North Korea, who have both openly declared hostility towards America, while also demonstrating at least an elementary capability to produce nuclear weapons? Because that would be awful.

Of course, Bill brought disgrace on his family and country with his sexual escapades; has proven an adept political manipulator, and was MIA during the Rwanda crisis (which he cites as his greatest failure). But while I would characterize Bill’s tenure as successful, he was nearly impeached. George will never go to trial. I guess he has something in common with his friends at Guantanamo Bay.

*Whether you are or whether you aren’t, if millions of people worldwide think you’re stupid, clearly you’ve done something wrong.

Ye be temptin' Davey Jones' locker with yer land-lubbin' talk

Ahoy! land lubbers! I appreciate everyone's co-operation for international talk-like-a-pirate day. Larry, you get extra points for completin' an entire appraisal in pirate-speak, although I'm aye it confused more than a few people t' see t' value presented in doubloons. Well done, lads! We'll see you on international talk-like-a-ninja day. Ha, gotcha! Ninja's don't talk- they communicate with their minds!

Vanity, thy name is man

I caught a glimpse of an MTV show where we watch young women getting botox and implant surgery. One young woman talked about how she wanted breast implants to look like Pam Anderson. This woman talked about how, shortly after her implant surgery, she experienced the following symptoms:



-her hair started falling out
-her glands became swollen
-her menstrual cycle ceased
-she was constantly nauseas

By the time her kidneys failed, she started doing research on the internet and found thousands of women who had suffered the same symptoms. When she had explant surgery, her symptoms cleared up, but only after she gave the best years of her life to this sickness.

I brought this up to highlight the dangers of cosmetic surgery. I didn’t even mention how breast implants can decrease your chances of detecting breast cancer, or how people have died from incorrectly-administered anesthetic. We need to hear more stories like these. Just look up breast implants on google images and you'll see the devastation unleashed upon the bosom of today's women.

I think our emphasis on beauty is sad, but it is also clearly dangerous. People risk skin cancer to have a tan. People injects poison into their skin to avoid wrinkles. What we value as a society is demonstrated by where we place our resources. With all the money we put into tanning salons, botox centers, cosmetic surgeons and diet pills, there is clearly too much emphasis going to the wrong places. Shame on us.

My life

No one wins

I'm so sick of the partisan bullshit being proliferated in all manner of media these days, from television to the blogosphere. I'm starting to even hate the word blogosphere, though I am a regular (if unheard of) contributor to the online community. All day every day, leftists and rightists take intellectual pot-shots at each other. Everyone complains that we keep talking past each other, and yet we keep fucking talking PAST EACH OTHER! Conservatives claim the liberals dominate the news media, so they stake their claim in a.m. talk radio. Shame on both of them for not pursuing balanced news and radio programming.

I admit I am guilty of perpetuating the cycle. I see an attack, and I want to avenge it. But, as I often say, violence begets more violence, even if it is verbal.

It's true- we have a lot of shit on each other, dating back a long way. We cannot disown the ideologies and strategies we subscribe to, but let's be honest with ourselves about the kind of world we want to live in and the most honest, morally upright methods to pursue that. Barring that (because, realistically, I don't think we will ever agree), let's discuss the points we agree on.

For starters, can we agree that every modern government is flawed, and is motivated by political self-interest. That's not to say there aren't decent, talented people involved in government, but I think the illusion that countries and their governments act out of kindness contributes to an inflated sense of moral superiority.

I have had many conversations with a conservative friend back in Canada which played out like chess games. It was an open debate; he would make a point, I would rebut, we move on. Today’s political conversations are more like knife fights, and no one wins.

Rush into things

Rush Limbaugh’s very existence offends me. I hate him as a broadcaster, as a political philosopher and (on some grounds) as a person. I hate him, and the I hate the type of person that he represents. He's not interested in pursuing truth. His primary focus is in disseminating hatred towards a particular ideology (that which is not his own). He has the air of a cocky schoolboy currently enjoying the favour of the latest school marm. He’s a brat and a tattle-tale-- the Eddie Haskel of broadcasting.

Below is Rush’s mission statement:

I love being a conservative. We conservatives are proud of our philosophy. Unlike our liberal friends, who are constantly looking for new words to conceal their true beliefs and are in a perpetual state of reinvention, we conservatives are unapologetic about our ideals.
We are confident in our principles and energetic about openly advancing them. We believe in individual liberty, limited government, capitalism, the rule of law, faith, a color-blind society and national security.
We support school choice, enterprise zones, tax cuts, welfare reform, faith-based initiatives, political speech, homeowner rights and the war on terrorism.
And at our core we embrace and celebrate the most magnificent governing document ever ratified by any nation — the U.S. Constitution. Along with the Declaration of Independence, which recognizes our God-given natural right to be free, it is the foundation on which our government is built and has enabled us to flourish as a people.
We conservatives are never stronger than when we are advancing our principles.


To the claim that his liberal friends are constantly looking for new words to conceal their true beliefs and are constantly in a state of reinvention, I have this to say: the pride you exhibit in your extremist views is misplaced. History has not looked kindly on extremists, and I would proudly declare that my goal is to be balanced. You demonstrate your growing irrelevance by clinging to extremism.

That’s not to say liberals don’t have beliefs, but the community is large and represents a diverse range of beliefs. I won’t echo them here as they are widely known, but I am proud to be aligned with a group which promotes peace, human rights, individual freedom and environmentalism.

You say you support individual liberty, yet you blindly buoy the government’s initiatives to eavesdrop on its own people. You advocate a colour-blind society, and yet you have a history of racially-insensitive comments (see Rush’s ESPN comments about Donovan McNabb). You say you support faith-based initiatives. I say you do, as long as the faith is not Muslim.

Don’t call liberals your friends, even in jest. Your rigorous evasion of balance and fairness makes me wonder why millions of people tune in every week.


Originally I started this entry as an argument against torture, which Mr. Limbaugh also advocates, as it relates to the so-called ‘war on terror.’ This turned into something bigger than that, so I’ll have to save my opinions on that for another day.

Steve Irwin, 1962-2006

Although I've never been a big fan of Steve Irwin's shows, I respect and appreciate his work as a conservationist, and admire that he was a caring (if somewhat reckless) father. It is a sad irony that the man who was known for handling the world's deadliest animals, died filming a mere stingray. It just goes to show you how random the world is.

Discovered by the Germans in 1904, they named it San Diego, which of course in German means a whale's vagina.

Today, Dara and I went to San Diego. Despite the blazing heat, we had a lot of fun. It was more like San Diego, the light version, because we only had time to check out the zoo and the gaslamp district. Both were a lot of fun. The zoo was a brief study of crazy-looking mammals with various mating calls and displays of aggression. The animals were pretty interesting too. The heat slowed us down somewhat, but it was nothing a little bus tour couldn't help.

After the zoo, we embraced the bohemian lifestyle of the gas lamp quarter. We had a nice little italian dinner and then walked around and enjoyed the architecture and youthful vibe of downtown San Diego. All in all, a good day.


-Side note: I just heard a Jon Brion song over a WTC Memorial Site commercial. Interesting.